GLyr

Alaska Thunderfuck – Christmas Sweater

song cover

Lyrics Alaska Thunderfuck – Christmas Sweater

Text:

It’s Christmas
Geez, Christmas is terrible

Willam:
I’m never, ever, ever, gonna get it together

Dad don’t give a shit
And my sisters say whatever
All good, I’m cool
My mom threw the tree off in the inground pool
Some about something cause I’m underage drinking
It’s easy sneaking liquor when they’re cooking in the kitchen
Woke up, tree side
Got the garbage can lid for a ghetto sleigh ride

All:
And this could be…
(Gingerbread tastes like jäger)
The worst Christmas ever
(Bitch you don’t know a sled)

Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater
Don’t care what Santa brings won’t send him a letter
Make a list and check it twice, it won’t make it better
Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

Courtney Act:
My entire family’s on the morning flight to Paris
Night before they punished me and sent me to the attic
(Go to your room!)
Woke up, rolled out
Mum forgot about me on the plane and freaked out
(Courtney!)
Two guys tried to break into my house but I was smarter
Set a bunch of traps, set a guy on fire

Yeah I, nearly died
Mum had to ask John Candy for a ride

Alaska:
Wait a second, that sounds really familiar
Courtney:
No, no, that’s my family Christmas, that’s what happened
Alaska:
Do they even have Christmas in Australia?
Courtney:
No…

All:
Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater
Don’t care what Santa brings won’t send him a letter
Make a list and check it twice, it won’t make it better
Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

Alaska:
So, there is this one year,
And it was Christmas,
And my brother got karate patches,
And I really wanted to get karate patches,
So I thought I was gonna get karate patches,
And then I didn’t get karate patches

Courtney:
Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater
Don’t care what Santa brings won’t send him a letter

All:
Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater
Don’t care what Santa brings won’t send him a letter
Make a list and check it twice, it won’t make it better
Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

Alaska:
Okay Courtney here’s the part where you sing like Mariah Carey, go, go

Courtney:
No I’m not doing it this year everybody made fun of me last year, y-you do it

Alaska:
Fine I’ll do it okay ready

Courtney:
Why didn’t you tell me you could sing like that?

Willam:
Happy Birthday Hanukkah!