Lyrics Corey Taylor – X–M@$
Text:
Ho Ho Ho Ho!
There ain’t nothing more depressing than a pine tree
Gussied up candy canes and balls
Those carolers have kept me up for hours
Now I’m no Wiccan commie nut or nothing
But there’s one damn holiday that I can’t stand
It ain’t Halloween or Thanksgiving or even April Fools
But it’ll surely make a fool out of every man
HA
If I ain’t drunk then it ain’t Christmas
You know where to stick those jingle bells
If I ain’t hammered it ain’t Hanukkah
And all you motherfuckers go to hell
If I ain’t cockeyed it ain’t Kwanzaa
Joy to the world and jack and coke
If I ain’t drunk then it ain’t Christmas
Cause I never anything but broke
Now every year the malls are just a madhouse
Full of empty pockets, thoughts and smiles
Just the smell of Eggnog makes me vomit
And those colored lights are fucking infantile
I think we collectively as the people
Should rise against this corporate jolly noise
And tell the world:
«Let’s buy some peace and quiet for a change»
Before we spend it all on fucking toys
HA
So if I ain’t drunk then it ain’t Christmas
You know where to stick those jingle bells
Fa la la la la go fuck yourself!
If I ain’t cockeyed it ain’t Kwanzaa
Joy to the world of getting stoned
If I ain’t drunk then it ain’t Christmas
So leave this god damn scrooge the fuck alone
HA
MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS!