Текст Dan Bull – Definitely Not Fortnite

Wa-ba-da-ba-ba-bow
Familiar melody?
Wa-ba-da-ba-ba-bow
I wonder what this song’s not about

Ay, look
Here’s a type of game that you’ve never ever heard of
An island with a hundred people on it from an airdrop
Fighting each other inside an ever shrinking safe zone
While paying through the nose for some wacky custom made clothes
I can’t always keep every track tailored for the fanboys
Wow, have you seen how well this game plays on Android and iOS?
We’re saturatred with these type of battle games
It’s as if the industry’s incarcerated, shackled, chained
And that’s a shame, ’cause in between the shovelware
There could be fairly passable games, is this one?
I couldn’t care less
It’s yet another game I haven’t rapped about
So let me grab a pen and pad and we can crack one out
Lock and load, I’m ready
Cocky, hopping over hedges
Watch me no-scope in a moment
I’ll be popping open treasure boxes
Collecting lots of loot and tat, it’s like I’m Stuart Ashen
Trendsetter with a newer hat on, pure fashion master
Can’t take too much action, I’m super anxious
So I’ll camp out in the background like a damn scout
And shoot the passers by
My only plan: survive until I’m the last alive
Then head straight back to the sky like I’m a satellite

(I’ve been paid up front) To make introductions

What is this thing, anyway? Some kind of blimp taxi?
It’s definitely not a school bus, it’s pretty pimp, actually
See? Originality
Absolutely avant-garde
That’s at least one feature PUBG just hasn’t got
Right, let’s investigate somewhere we’ve never been before
So set the thing to north, we’re heading to the ski resort
Hang on, this area feels eerily familiar
Are you definitely sure we really haven’t been here?
K, I’ll take your word for it
I mean, I’ve never heard of it
So presumably, it’s new IP and free, no need to purchase it
A hundred players and my aim’s to be the first to get to victory
And if it means I need to do some dirty tricks
Fine, I’m about to do some damage, I’m absolutely savage
Mad as when the cabin crew managed to lose my baggage
I’m university challenge, you’re universally challenged
I do prefer to be telling the truth than hurtfully selling a spoof
Like, «how on Earth is he talented?»
Bank balance permanently swelling like a purple bellend, man
I’m telling you, cross Fortnite and Fortnite and what do you get?
Here’s the hook again, just in case you haven’t got it yet

(I’ve been paid up front) To make introductions
(Another battle royale game) Straight from production
(Apparently, this one’s called) Creative Destruction
(Like the rock formed from) Volcano eruptions
(I’ve been paid up front) To make introductions
(Another battle royale game) Straight from production
(Apparently, this one’s called) Creative Destruction
I made the lyrics up, it never came with instructions

Game devs
Get in touch
I’ll talk about your game
And make it seem okay
Not great, but okay