Lyrics Dan Bull – House Flipper
Text:
Ay, let me tell you what the deal is mate
I’m the biggest thing in real estate
Fearless, ay, making lowball bids
Winning the sale and taking home all this
Clean up till I need another new mop
Picking up dirt flipping endlessly
Till I break it down like m.o.p.
I demolish when I knock that wall
So polished when I mop that floor
Give it a shine that’ll drop that jaw
Of any buyer when they knock that door
As soon as they start walking up that hall
I know that it’s already sold, freehold or leasehold
I can turn concrete to bloody gold
I could sell you, a property for way more than the market value
Tell you what, here’s a one time offer if
You buy it now, I’ll knock a couple ton off of it
Can’t turn that down it’s a bargain?
It’s got a double garage you can park in
Look at the garden, white picket fence
You could live in it now or you could buy just to rent
Watch me flip this fucking house
Like nothing else
Lost count of the discounts that I’ve found
Look I’m luckin’ out
House flipper
Call me the house flipper
Nobody else can flip a house quicker
House flipper
Nobody else can flip a house quicker
House flipper
House flipper
Renovating and decorating is second nature to me
Changing a mess to a place so impressive
You’d better wait and then see
I’m a resident therapist
For anybody leaving their residence derelict
Wherever you live I’m going to step in and develop it
Take a trash heap
Leave a villa instead of it
Find an old place that is empty
Buy it and then I gentrify it
I don’t find property like you
Don’t do Zoopla, don’t do Rightmove
I buy buildings for like millions
Triple the price and provide for my children
I’m skilled in building shit
Chucking out junk see me fill this skip
If you don’t feel this, skip
‘Cause you can’t take it back to the dealership
Like a German whip this is a real commitment
I’m building buildings that are built for business
And the bill reflects this, skilled with checklists
I fill with exes, until the check clears
And then I do it again even bigger and better
Repeating the method and leaving realtors breathless
Watch me flip this fucking house
Like nothing else
Lost count of the discounts that I’ve found
Look I’m luckin’ out
House flipper
Call me the house flipper
Nobody else can flip a house quicker
House flipper
Call me the house flipper
Nobody else can flip a house quicker
House flipper
House flipper
