Текст Dan Bull – iDubbbz Rap Roast (Rap Roasts #1)
Текст:
Hello Ian, how the hell have you been?
It’s me again, your favorite rapping European
I’m here to leave you burnt like black toast
Welcome to the first ever episode of Rap Roasts
Ian, the type of content you make’s that gross
You’re just milk intolerance, lactose
Now, for anyone who’s unfamilliar with your channel watching
You do a really funny series called «Bad Unboxing»
So I brought a box full of props of raps I’m dropping
And after that you could use it as your actual coffin
You already know smoking’s bad for your health
So you must really crave having two fags in you mouth
Time to destress
Stop and take a deep breath
Not because you need air, fuck, I just want to hear you speak less
You look a reet mess
Woody Allen meets meth
Your ideal orgy’s a sausage meat fest
You’re so scrawny and you’ve got such a meek chest
That you still wear your age 0-3 vest
Invisible eyebrows on fleek, yes
With specs that thick you’re never going to see chef
Of all the Ians in the world you’re the least best
You’re a bad driver, you deserve to have your jeep wrecked
You frail cracker, I could snap you like a crackerjack
And by the way, the past wants its glasses back
I’m a bit funny looking, check the size of my head
It still got nothing on your giant surprise egg
I’d lie to break it open, that’d be delightful
You look like a scrotum rolled over a lightbulb
You’re just milk intolerance, lactose
Now, for anyone who’s unfamilliar with your channel watching
You do a really funny series called «Bad Unboxing»
So I brought a box full of props of raps I’m dropping
And after that you could use it as your actual coffin
You already know smoking’s bad for your health
So you must really crave having two fags in you mouth
Time to destress
Stop and take a deep breath
Not because you need air, fuck, I just want to hear you speak less
You look a reet mess
Woody Allen meets meth
Your ideal orgy’s a sausage meat fest
You’re so scrawny and you’ve got such a meek chest
That you still wear your age 0-3 vest
Invisible eyebrows on fleek, yes
With specs that thick you’re never going to see chef
Of all the Ians in the world you’re the least best
You’re a bad driver, you deserve to have your jeep wrecked
You frail cracker, I could snap you like a crackerjack
And by the way, the past wants its glasses back
I’m a bit funny looking, check the size of my head
It still got nothing on your giant surprise egg
I’d lie to break it open, that’d be delightful
You look like a scrotum rolled over a lightbulb
When you were born your mum thought she’d either done a turd or given birth to a puppet out of thunderbirds
Say something
I’ll take your fake diamond play button
And give you a face fucking
So you can taste sucking
You lame shut in
Get out and get some sunlight
Training for a fight’s quite effective if it’s done right
But you don’t want to get into the ring with Jinx
You do want to get into Jinx’s ring, methinks
Ugh, sitting in your room topping up your cummy sock
Then sucking out every fluffy crusty yummy drop
Like a hungry Winnie The Pooh tonguing a honey pot
And when you catch a cold, you bukkake runny snot
Bouncing up and down on your thumb like a bunny hop
Shouting «Mommy watch! You’re gonna miss the m-m- money shot»
Sonny, stop before your briefs get a heavy leak
The human rectum shouldn’t stretch more than ten inch deep
Remember when we went to Venice Beach?
You kept walking ’round talking with insensitive offensive speech
‘Till you annoyed a fella with Floyd Mayweather’s physique
And he did to you what Drake did to Meek
Ooh, Drama Alert, someone contact Keemstar
You’re not a real cop Ian, where’s your police car?
Rearrange the letters in Content Cop
And see that it’s an anagram of concept, not
Kickstarter crap, crap skater trick, prick attack
Err, crack raper tits
Okay, even when I say that I’m cleverer than iDubbbz
More popular too, here, have some of my subs
You’re just like me, were both acting like thugs
But are prone to panic attacks in nightclubs
Yo, the only time that you would fire slugs
Was if your zoo was overstaffed and you don’t like bugs
Museums are the only time of you seeing nice jugs
And your dealer needs to see prescriptions when you buy drugs
And now it’s crunch time for the final punchline
I can’t come up with one so just like and subscribe
Cringe
I’m just playing, iDubbbz, you know I love you
Say something
I’ll take your fake diamond play button
And give you a face fucking
So you can taste sucking
You lame shut in
Get out and get some sunlight
Training for a fight’s quite effective if it’s done right
But you don’t want to get into the ring with Jinx
You do want to get into Jinx’s ring, methinks
Ugh, sitting in your room topping up your cummy sock
Then sucking out every fluffy crusty yummy drop
Like a hungry Winnie The Pooh tonguing a honey pot
And when you catch a cold, you bukkake runny snot
Bouncing up and down on your thumb like a bunny hop
Shouting «Mommy watch! You’re gonna miss the m-m- money shot»
Sonny, stop before your briefs get a heavy leak
The human rectum shouldn’t stretch more than ten inch deep
Remember when we went to Venice Beach?
You kept walking ’round talking with insensitive offensive speech
‘Till you annoyed a fella with Floyd Mayweather’s physique
And he did to you what Drake did to Meek
Ooh, Drama Alert, someone contact Keemstar
You’re not a real cop Ian, where’s your police car?
Rearrange the letters in Content Cop
And see that it’s an anagram of concept, not
Kickstarter crap, crap skater trick, prick attack
Err, crack raper tits
Okay, even when I say that I’m cleverer than iDubbbz
More popular too, here, have some of my subs
You’re just like me, were both acting like thugs
But are prone to panic attacks in nightclubs
Yo, the only time that you would fire slugs
Was if your zoo was overstaffed and you don’t like bugs
Museums are the only time of you seeing nice jugs
And your dealer needs to see prescriptions when you buy drugs
And now it’s crunch time for the final punchline
I can’t come up with one so just like and subscribe
Cringe
I’m just playing, iDubbbz, you know I love you