Текст Lil’ Kim – Answering Machine Skit 2

*phone rings*

Kim’s voicemail:
Hey what’s up? Leave me a massage and I’ll get back to you!

Yo Kim what’s good? Holla at your boy. Just waiting for you to get back up in here so we can make another classic,you know what I mean? Any lil’ extra com you need I got that black car for you it’s nothing and matter of fact imma hold them royalty checks, put them in a little stock and bond so when you out of there you’re all good. ‘aight?

Yo Kim this Julie Greenwald calling. Everybody is calling me, this album is fucking off the hook. I got Halle Berry dying to be in your next video. You gotta call me man, pick up the phone call me, we gotta lock some shit down while you’re away. But this shit is on fire, call me!

Yo Kim what up? It’s Sha man, whassup? I see you ain’t answering the phone but uumm…hold your head while you in there I know is nothing you a soldier, holla at your boy. Sha-Dash.

Yo Kim, pick up, what up? It’s Kev Lars. Oh shit, I forgot, call me back, I guess you’ll call me back when you get that quarter. You know, call me back when you get a chance baby girl, I’m just missing you, wanna give you an update, you know me, I know you listening to the voicemail. But you so hot you might have a cell in there, so give me a call back, aight? Peace!

Yo Kim it’s your brother man, just calling (Ay what up Kim?) saying God damn, we gotta do this bullet. But uumm, we gon’ knock it down, you a Jones God damn it, you got Jones in your blood, you gon’ do that man, you gon’ knock that bullet right in the ass.

Kim what up? It’s Hill. Listen,call me when you get this I need to talk to you it’s real real real real important. I got Donald Trump called earlier this morning wants to know what’s up, when you gon’ go in with him half partners on this hotel. And then you got Bill Gates calling on the computer stuff. Rundell calling me every five minutes, like he needs answers, I just need you to call me when you get this it’s real important, aight? Talk to you in a minute, peace!

Ayo you never answer your motherfucking phone, it’s you boy Ado, you know. Yo I just got back on the real, y’know I’m saying. You got a banger I heard the ablum is exceptional, y’know I’m saying? I’m looking foward to spending some of these millions!

What up Kimmy? It’s Sugar Shav here, imma call you every motherfucking day and play a new motherfucking beat on your phone, you heard? Word!

My name’s Nigel motherfucker,your bootlegger. I bootleg everything! I done told you that before motherfucker. What the fuck is wrong with you motherfuckers? You keep talking she’s walking.