Текст Bart Baker – Happy Parody

Pharrell Williams:
I’m forty-one but look like I am eight
Thirty-two pounds is how much I weigh
My hat’s so big you can see it from space

Cue awful dancing
Clap along if you love watching people who can’t dance
My style is tacky
I look like Smokey the Bear in this ridiculous brown hat
This song’s so crappy
That it’s used by the Army to torture people in Iraq
I’m so unhappy
But you’d never know because I just did a shit ton of crack

I really owe Daft Punk and Robin Thicke
‘Cause without them I’d be irrelevant

Daft Punk:
You need to polish our dicks until they both shine

Robin Thicke:
But before that let’s snort some blurred lines

All:
We’re way too happy

Pharrell:
Clap along if you’re high and you just wanna clap

All:
We’re way too happy
The only way to stand this song is to take ecstasy and do smack
Happy, happy, happy

Pharrell:
Apparently saying the same word ninety times guarantees a smash

All:

Businessman:
Holy shit, I love happiness
Please take all of my hard-earned cash

Pharrell:
I’m shaking now
Did so much speed
Have to make sure that I stay happy
So I can brainwash humanity
With this dumb song and then
Sell more CDs

Prozac Attorney:
Stop, I’m here to sue Pharrell
I’m a Prozac attorney
The whole world’s happy because of this goddamn song
And our drug sales are tanking

Style Police:
Freeze, Style Police
Pharrell, you’re under arrest for that fugly-ass brown headpiece

Pharrell:
But it’s trendy

Style Police:
It’s way too big for your head
You look like an ad for Arby’s

Doctor:
Guys, stop arguing
Pharrell, I got your tests back and found out why your hat looks so big
You are shrinking
That is also why your voice sounds like a prepubescent kid

Pharrell:
What are you saying?

Doctor:
According to this chart
You have ten more seconds to live

Pharrell:
Doc, please help me

Doctor:
There’s nothing that can be done
Say goodbye to your fake happiness

Style Police:
Thank God that horrible song is over! Now, will someone please get in here and burn that fucking hat?